Jan 28, 2004
Alright, so I am kinda upset/sad/mad, whatever you want to call it. One of the people I thought was one of my best friends at KU is I guess falling away from me, and it sucks. I don't even know why, but it may be because she has a lot of things going on right now and doesn't want to talk about them, with me at least. The reason I know I upset about it is because I had several dreams about her, and I tend to dream about the things that are upsetting me. I don't know, I am just sad because I thought that we were really good friends and since we have been back at school, we really haven't talked. Oh well, I hope things get back to how they used to be.
My classes are good for the most part. I really don't like my spanish class, I feel like the dumbest kid in the class and like I don't belong because my spanish is not that advanced. I have to stay in it though, because it is the last class I need to fulfill my foreign language requirement. Otherwise, I am just worried that I won't make very good grades, which I need desperately since I am on academic probation. KU is so fun and I love it here, but the stress of classes and grades is going to get to me.
I have also got a date with "Bookie" Mike. I lost a poker bet, so I have to go out with him, we will see how it goes. It should be very interesting.
Posted at 12:24 pm by incogneato
Jan 20, 2004
I have compiled my list of the things I would like to change most about myself. Resolutions if you will.
1. Improve my grades considerably
2. Get in shape and lose weight
3. Stop drinking/cut back on alcohol
Hopefully I am successful, only time will tell.
Posted at 12:10 am by incogneato
Jan 19, 2004
I am ready to go back to KU. I miss the dorms and I finally got my schedule arranged the way I wanted it. I am tired of living at home and all my friends from high school have already gone back to their colleges.
Today I went to one of the most trashy towns I have ever been to, the reason why: beltbuckles. After going to some incredibly dumpy stores, I found one I liked at a liquor store. It is really cool, but who knows how often I will wear it.
Joe's Crab Shack went from being one of my favorite restaurants to one of my least favorites very quickly. Food poisoning sucks, especially when you are at the movies.
Jess is now beginning to experience the "bad roommate" situation. We will be lucky if she makes it through this week without killing her roommate or her boyfriend. Her roommates boyfriend has become the third roommate, and that is never good.
KU drama is tiresome, but yet I am ready to get back to it. I am excited to see the girls and I miss the guys, and I really miss the late night activities, like Java Break and late night "studying."
I have now come to grips with the fact that I might be becoming "soft." I think it is ok because I am still the same person, but I am just more considerate now, I think anyway.
Posted at 11:08 pm by incogneato
Jan 15, 2004
Last night I was informed that I am becoming "soft". For some reason this kind of upset me, I have never really thought of myself as a "soft" person. xxxHARDCORE BAD ASSxxx is the way to be!
Posted at 06:25 pm by incogneato
Jan 9, 2004
Tonight was fun, I got to see Boomer and Adam. We went to the pool hall, it was a little scary and very smokey. After that, we just hung out and talked. Good times.
After talking to one of my good friends at KU tonight, I realized that there is probably more drama at KU then there was in high school. The sad part about it is that all the drama is with the guys, all the girls seem to get along just fine.
He was telling me how he was upset with another friend from KU because she didn't stick up for him at a party on New Year's Eve. I see where he is coming from because I would hope/expect that my friends would stick up for me, but you never know.
Speaking of this, Betsy is amazing. I am pretty much in awe of her and admire her in every way, but she will probably never know this. One reason I am saying this is because of the way she stood up for me. I was unware of it at the time, I didn't tell her that she needed to, and I never, in my wildest dreams, thought she would react in the way she did. In brief, this guy was kind of a jerk to me one night after a party, and left me several degrading voicemails later on, so I mentioned it to her, thinking nothing of it. Well it turns out that Betsy happened to be at the same club he was at the next week. Apparently when she saw him, she just tore into him and caused a commotion. After that she saw him again and proceeded to yell at him some more while he yelled back at her, and to top it off, she saw him as they were leaving the club and had a few words with him again, letting him know just what she thought of him and how he shouldn't have treated me like that. I could not believe that she did that. It would have been so easy for her to just ignore him and have fun at the club, but instead she decided that she needed to stick up for me. What can I say, I think Betsy is the most loyal person/friend that I have ever met. It is hard to describe in words just how much that gesture meant to me. Wow.
Posted at 03:35 am by incogneato
Jan 8, 2004
My grades are terrible. They are the worst I have ever earned in my whole life.
1.82 GPA & Adacemic probation.
Enough said. I had a long talk with Kerry over the situation with my grades, what to do about them, and wether or not to tell my mom. She made me feel a lot better, which is great. But on top of that, I received my academic probation letter in the mail and took it before my mom could see it, this could potentially cause a whole different problm. I have also spent lots of time talking to Bilal and listening to his advice. I probably spend the most time talking to him about everything, I think he genuinely cares about me nd my grades. I emailed my advisor, now I'm just waiting for a response. Wow, I really screwed myself over, now the only thing to do is work 1000 times harder and try to earn much better grades. This upcoming semester will not be nearly as fun as my first semester, but I'm willing to do what it takes to bring up my grades. I have a feeling Kerry and Bilal are going to be all over me when it comes to studying.
Academic Probation = If I do not earn a 2.5 GPA this semester, I will get kicked out of school.
I also screwed myself in Spanish, I don't know if I will be able to get retroactive credit, or if I will have to retake some spanish classes, or what. This is why my class schedule is messed up and also the only reason why I am not looking forward to going back to school. My mom is bound to find out about my grades and my credit hours, I guess I will just face punishment then. I'm too big of a coward to tell her now, I fear the consequences like WHOA! No one back home knows just how bad my grades are, except Robin, she is totally understanding, but disappointed just the same.
College turned out to be much more difficult than I originally thought. Scott always told me how easy KU was when I was still in high school, but he was wrong, but then again I see his grades and realize I don't want to be like that.
Posted at 02:08 am by incogneato
Jan 7, 2004
Well, due to the encouraging of a close friend, I finally broke down and started an online journal. I have always said how stupid these things are, but he says I should try it, so I guess I will.
Well today turned out to be pretty good. I got to see Robin for the first time since I have been at college. While hanging out with her, I realized how cool Robin is and why she was my best friend for so long. Yeah, today was a great day. We spent tons of time just talking and catching up, it was nice. Oh yeah, and spent 4 hours watching Scarface. Classic.
Talking to Robin today has made me realize just how fun college is. I love it: the freedom and the people, amongst many other things. It also made me realize how great some of my friends are, especially compared to my old high school friends. Don't get me wrong, I had a blast in high school, and senior year was just amazing, but my high school friends don't even begin to compare to the people I have met while being at KU. (Except maybe a couple of them.)
It would be nice to write about some of my favorite times from both high school as well as college. Maybe next time.
Posted at 03:17 am by incogneato